Keep forgetting things? Relax (no, really)—these tactics for improving your memory can keep you calm, too

Over the past couple of decades, attention spans have shrunk. Tethered to our computers and smartphones, we carry our little devices everywhere, a few clicks away from all the information we need to survive. 

The rise of the digital age has impacted our ability to focus and remember. We’re living at a time when memorizing isn’t required to get through day-to-day life. Worried about forgetting someone’s birthday? Just set an automatic reminder. Don’t know the route you’re supposed to take to that restaurant you’ve driven to only once? Enter the destination on your GPS of choice. Forget about remembering your emergency contact’s phone numbers. In a 2023 survey of 423 respondents older than 16, 21% admitted to typing “What’s my phone number” into Google.

What is memory? 

Memory is the process by which our brains filter and retain important information, helping us make sense of the world and navigate its uncertainties. Memory allows us to reason, plan, and imagine, and it’s crucial for communication, connection, identity formation, and grounding ourselves in time and space.

Rather than being a perfect record of past events, memory serves as a dynamic resource that evolves based on new experiences and insights, according to professor Charan Ranganath, director of the Memory and Plasticity program at the University of California, Davis. 

The things we usually call memories are part of the episodic memory system, which stores memories of episodes of your life, like having a conversation with a colleague or going to the grocery store, explained Art Markman, a professor of psychology at the University of Texas at Austin, in a previous Fast Company report. 

When we recall a memory, we don’t simply replay the past as it happened. Instead, we reimagine how the past could have been, adapting our memories to fit the present context. For instance, if someone you trust lies to you, or you get food poisoning after enjoying a meal at a restaurant, you revise your memories based on this new information to better navigate similar situations in the future. This adaptability helps our memories stay relevant as our lives and environments change​. 

“When we look at memory as a resource to pull from, as opposed to a comprehensive archive of the past, we can make mindful choices in the present to curate a rich set of memories to take with us into the future,” Ranganath said in a previous Fast Company report. 

One approach to thinking about how the brain stores memories is based on economics, Markman wrote in a previous Fast Company report. The currency of the brain is energy, and the brain itself is an energy-hungry organ. To build a new memory, structures have to grow that influence the neurons in the pathway that is storing that memory, to ensure that the pattern of brain activity associated with that memory can be created again.

Memories are more likely to be stored when the cost of creating the new connection is likely to reduce the time the brain will have to spend doing something in the future. The brain is investing energy now to reduce future costs.

For example, if you have an important and deep conversation with a colleague, there is likely to be future time savings in storing a memory of that conversation. When you see that colleague again, remembering that conversation will make the next discussion more efficient.

This energy-based evaluation is further influenced by two key factors, according to Markman: desirable difficulty and intense emotions. Desirable difficulty is when a task is challenging but productive, signaling to the brain that it is worth storing the memory to improve future performance. 

On the other hand, intense emotions—whether positive, like excitement, or negative, like shock or pain—amplify the brain’s calculation that the memory will be useful later.

By leveraging these mechanisms, the brain dynamically stores memories likely to enhance our ability to navigate similar future scenarios, rather than simply serving as a comprehensive archive of every experience.

Three situations when you’re more likely to forget—and what to do about it

When multitasking: This one feels obvious. You can’t remember something if you aren’t paying attention.

Multitasking is a major culprit when it comes to memory issues. Studies show that most people are not good at multitasking, despite thinking otherwise. Every time you switch tasks—such as checking emails or responding to messages while in a meeting—you pay a “switching cost,” according to Ranganath. 

This constant shifting leads to fragmented, blurry memories, making it hard to retain important details. You’re more likely to make mistakes, it will take longer to complete tasks, and you won’t retain much of what you did. To improve memory, you should focus on one task at a time and minimize distractions.

Research shows a strong correlation between poor memory and attention lapses and media multitasking. Memory depends heavily on goal-directed cognition. Essentially we need to be ready to remember, have attention engaged, and a memory goal in mind to retrieve our memories, according to Anthony Wagner, the Lucie Stern Professor in the social sciences at Stanford University. 

“While it’s logical that attention is important for learning and for remembering, an important point here is that the things that happen even before you begin remembering are going to affect whether or not you can actually reactivate a memory that is relevant to your current goal,” Wagner said to Stanford Report. 

When you intend to do something and it slips your mind: At home, if one partner always intends to do household tasks but forgets, it increases the mental load of the person picking up the slack. At work, forgetting to send out that email or attend that meeting can impact your career. Forgetfulness can build a lot of resentment if left unaddressed. 

“Whether you intend to vote, get a flu shot, or meditate, there is an action/attention gap that’s as wide as the Grand Canyon. And it’s so solvable,” Katy Milkman, a professor of operations, information, and decisions at the Wharton School, told Fast Company reporter Stephanie Vozza.

To overcome that gap, Milkman suggests thinking through all the logistical details required to implement the given task in order to anticipate pitfalls in advance and commit to the plan. 

“You’re more likely to follow through once you make a commitment. It feels uncomfortable to go back on it when something is concrete versus a vague intention. If you commit, you’ll be backing out on yourself,” Milkman told Fast Company. 

She also recommends setting up “cues”—anything that triggers your memory, such as an event or location—to prompt you to take action. For example, getting a raise could be a cue to increase your monthly retirement contribution. 

Reminders are useful when we can act on them immediately. Plan ahead and leverage technology to send yourself timely reminders in advance. 

When you work with others: After an argument with someone, they often seem to have a totally different recollection of events—one in which they didn’t do anything wrong. At work, if you ask coworkers how a project came together, they may have totally different memories of who came up with what ideas.

Why? One reason is ego. We all tend to paint ourselves as the hero of our own life story. 

Our brains tend to rewrite history even as it’s happening, Markman explained. We tend to interpret our own actions in the most charitable way and give less credit to others than they may deserve. As much of this interpretation happens as the event is initially experienced, they become baked into the memory of the event. 

While it’s not a bad thing for our memories to focus on our side of the story, to get a full picture of what happened, we need to use each other to fill in our gaps. If all else fails, we can always fall back on the tried-and-true method of taking notes by hand. 

“When you’re writing, you’re thinking more, and you might have more insight about what is most important at the time,” Princeton University psychological scientist Pam Mueller told Fast Company. Science has shown that taking notes by hand makes you more likely to retain information. 

Strategies to improve your memory for a specific task

While memory can be tricky, there are plenty of ways to boost it now and over time. Here are some actionable tips to improve memory in the moment, as you aim to memorize, remember, or recall lectures, notes, lists, and more. 

Utilize systems and associations: Our brains can handle only three to four chunks of information at a time, according to neuroscientists. To get around the loophole, sort facts and information into chunks through mnemonic devices, such as acronyms, rhymes, and songs. 

Teachers regularly employ mnemonics: Young children often learn their ABCs with the “ABC song” and the 50 states in alphabetical order through the “Fifty Nifty United States” song. Kathleen Davis, deputy editor at Fast Company, adapted this technique to teach her kids to remember her phone number by turning it into an earworm of a song.

The ultimate proof that this method works: When I was in elementary school, my friend taught me how to remember the four cardinal directions (Never Eat Soggy Waffles). Fifteen years later, my brain still recites it on autopilot. 

Focus on what you want to remember: Hopefully, you remember the pitfalls of multitasking. (You’re more likely to make mistakes, it will take longer to complete tasks, and you won’t retain much of what you did.) So, it makes sense that one of the best ways to remember things is to focus. 

While the first step is to switch off and remove yourself from distractions, Fast Company’s Davis said she takes it a step further by purposefully pausing in the moment to soak it all in. 

“Before I got married, everyone told me that my wedding day would be a blur and I wouldn’t remember much of it,” Davis wrote. “So on the day, in the middle of a beautiful moment, I made sure to pause and tell myself to remember it. Twelve years later, and I still remember those moments.” 

Write it down: Writing by hand is more than just a nostalgic practice; it’s a powerful memory booster. 

Many studies show that writing notes by hand is more effective for retaining information. The most annoying thing about writing by hand is also what makes it so effective for learning: It forces us to slow down.

When you write by hand, you write more thoughtfully. Such mindful writing rests the brain, unlocking potential creativity, said neuroscientist Claudia Aguirre. “Recent neuroscientific research has uncovered a distinct neural pathway that is only activated when we physically draw out our letters,” she wrote. “And this pathway, etched deep with practice, is linked to our overall success in learning and memory.”

Embrace error-driven learning: The brain is wired to learn from mistakes and challenges, a phenomenon called error-driven learning. 

Attempting to recall a memory is like a stress test, said Ranganath. If your brain struggles to do it, once you get the answer, the brain can repair the coalition of neurons that are responsible for pulling up that memory so that next time, it can come up more easily.

Error-driven learning explains the benefits that come when we actively learn by doing rather than passively learn by memorizing. It helps explain why students benefit more from practice tests than simply studying. This is also a key reason why students are generally better at retaining information after they have been tested on the material rather than if they only studied it.

The implication is huge. We learn the most when we are being productively challenged. 

Engage your senses: Focusing on the sights, smells, sounds, and other sensory information in the moment can help create lasting memories, according to Ranganath. This approach can be especially helpful in locating misplaced items, like keys. So, if you’re trying to create a lasting memory, stop and take in all the sensory information you can, even momentarily, while you put your keys away. 

“Later on, when you need to find your keys, you’ll call to mind that sensory information that puts you back to that moment where you set them down,” Ranganath said.

That may seem impossible when you’re doing common, everyday things, but that’s the point. If you are chronically forgetting something, taking that extra time can provide a solution. 

Tie your memory to a creative storyline: Although there are a number of science-backed strategies when it comes to making connections and enhancing your memory, when you really think about the underpinnings of a strong memory, it has everything to do with creativity, memory training specialist Harry Lorayne told Fast Company. 

To enhance your memory, instead of coming up with devices that have no association in your brain, pretend you’re working on a creative project and come up with a story about whatever you’re trying to remember. 

When it comes to memorization, it’s the feelings and senses that make all the difference. Think back to the strongest memories you have—there’s a good chance those memories are linked to some kind of strong emotion or sensation. 

Create a “memory palace”: Katie Kermode, one of the top 100 memory athletes in the world, told Fast Company that she creates what she calls a memory palace in her head to store and recall information by anchoring it to familiar locations. 

To build one, choose a space you know well, like your home, and mentally assign pieces of information to different rooms or objects within that space. For example, if you’re trying to memorize a list of kings and queens from England, you might anchor each name to a specific object in the palace. Then, create a story around each name and its corresponding location and object in your memory palace. 

When you need to recall the information, simply “journey” through your memory palace. 

“If they’re just names, it doesn’t really mean anything, but if they all have a different place, you can create a whole story and environment around each one,” Kermode said. “So, every time you learn a new fact, you have somewhere to put it and it helps you anchor that new fact somewhere.”

Lifestyle changes to improve memory over time 

In addition to the tips and tricks provided above to bolster your ability to remember specific things in specific situations, below is a compilation of several research-backed lifestyle changes you can make to improve your memory over time. 

Exercise: Recent research shows that physical activity has positive impacts on the brain, particularly as it relates to memory. Healthy individuals who did moderate exercise for 25 minutes at least four days a week had bigger brains than those who didn’t. The differences were especially prevalent in the aspects of the brain that are responsible for thinking and memory. 

Memory champion Kermode said she is more alert when she tries to memorize something after exercising. 

Diversify your brain’s “training data”: Advanced artificial intelligence products acquire knowledge by plowing through massive amounts of human-generated training data. Humans, in contrast, get “training data” from our lived experiences, as we go to different places and interact with different people. 

Episodic memory (the ability to travel back in time to past events) allows us to use our unique experiences to update our knowledge and flexibly adapt to new situations rapidly. To maximize our episodic memory, Ranganath recommends diversifying our training data.

By changing our scenery, stepping out of our comfort zone, and exposing ourselves to people from diverse backgrounds and perspectives, we can form richer, more distinctive episodic memories. 

When we don’t diversify our training data, like during the pandemic lockdown, we have impoverished memories. As we spent each day sitting in the same room, interacting with the same people (mostly over screens), the days seemed to go on forever, and yet by the end of the week, we were left with few memories of what we did during that time.

In the age of generative AI, Ranganath said we can expect a premium to be placed on human creativity and innovation, which benefits from diversified lived experiences. 

“A new work of art, music, or literature doesn’t arise out of thin air—it emerges from the process of integrating elements from different past experiences,” he wrote. “What makes human imagination special is that it offers a version of reality marked by the idiosyncrasies of its creator, rather than a perfect recording. The same can be said of memory because our memories reflect both what we experienced and our interpretations of what happened.”

Journal: Once seen as the hobby of teenage girls, journaling has now become a staple of the self-care movement. And for good reason—research highlights numerous health benefits, including enhanced working memory.

I’ve personally not been able to fall into a daily routine of filling a journal page, though I do find that in times of high emotion, writing it all down is the most effective way to calm myself down and organize my thoughts. 

I have found a small routine. I’ve downloaded a journal app that sends me a notification daily. Though I often don’t find time to write as much as I think I should, I can always find a minute to at least attach a picture of my day and add a little note about my current moment. Reading the daily details and scrolling through the photos jogs my memory, helping me reconstruct days otherwise forgotten. 

Remove memory blockers: Set up your environment for success. That includes everything from your physical surroundings to how you’re notified about messages and tasks. Take time to eliminate “memory blockers.” This means choosing your technology’s notifications carefully, arranging your workspace thoughtfully, and setting up reminders to support your memory. 

Pause and rest: While getting enough good sleep is important for memory, it’s also important to take breaks and pause on the information you’ve taken in. 

These pauses are “exceptionally important,” Ranganath told Fast Company reporter Gwen Moran. Depending on the context, pauses let you strengthen a memory or prioritize the information you’re taking in. 

Pick up a book: While puzzles like sudoku and crosswords are often touted as memory-building tools, research from the Beckman Institute found that reading novels may be even more effective for preserving memory as you age. According to the study, reading engages both working memory and episodic memory. As we dive into a novel, our episodic memory recalls what happened in previous chapters, while our working memory helps us keep track of what happened in recent paragraphs.  

Call a friend: Stress can negatively impact your memory, but low to moderate levels of stress, when managed well, can actually improve it. A study from the University of Georgia found that participants who claimed they had support from family and friends also appeared more able to cope with low to moderate stress levels in a healthy manner. Those who had low to moderate levels of perceived stress also had elevated working memory neural activation, resulting in better mental performance.

Calling a friend or leaning on your social circle during stressful times can strengthen your mental performance and memory, as numerous studies show social support is essential for maintaining psychological health. 

Use your smartphone: Contrary to popular belief, relying on your smartphone can actually boost your memory. Research from University College London (UCL) shows that digital devices help people store and remember important information, in turn freeing up their memory to recall additional less-important things. 

“The results show that external memory tools work. Far from causing ‘digital dementia,’ using an external memory device can even improve our memory for information that we never saved,” Sam Gilbert, professor of cognitive neuroscience at UCL, said in a statement. 

A relaxing and creative endeavor

Improving your memory doesn’t have to be a daunting task. By incorporating simple lifestyle changes—and embracing creative strategies and mental tools like the examples above—memory enhancement can be both rewarding and enjoyable. 

Memory champion Kermode said she views memory training as a fun and relaxing creative endeavor. 

“You can take time out and remember what you learn, and it’s quite relaxing, in a way,” she told Fast Company. “I think it’s a shame that we don’t memorize anything at all. Those abilities are still there. We just need to use them.”

Whether you’re mentally designing a memory palace, writing notes by hand, or even leveraging the technology around you, improving your memory is ultimately about enhancing your daily experiences and sharpening the way you navigate the world.