How should I handle being constantly interrupted?

Welcome to Pressing Questions, Fast Company’s work-life advice column. Every week, deputy editor Kathleen Davis, host of The New Way We Work podcast, will answer the biggest and most pressing workplace questions.Q:  How should I handle being constantly interrupted?A: Hold on, I’m going to let you finish . . . Being interrupted is not only annoying, it can feel demoralizing. It’s also incredibly common. Unsurprisingly, research shows that being talked over and interrupted in meetings happens much more to women, people of color, and LGBTQ+ employees. Also, the more senior the employee, the more likely they are to interrupt you. Which means there’s likely an uncomfortable power dynamic at play too.If you find that you are being interrupted a lot in meetings, it’s likely not your fault. Those who speak loudest or most frequently aren’t always the ones with the best ideas. But the work of changing those dynamics is a much bigger issue than we can tackle here. So let’s focus on what you can change.  You might take a page from Vice President Kamala Harris’s firm tone and direct messaging in her 2020 debate with Mike Pence: “If you don’t mind letting me finish, I’m speaking.” If it worked in shutting down Pence, it will hopefully get the message through to the spotlight-stealer in your office.  If that feels too confrontational, you can simply start back where you started after the interruption is finished by saying something like: “Thank you, Mike. To complete my point, I’d like to say . . . ” or  “One point I wanted to make is . . . ” This works whether you are interrupted to be contradicted or supported.But speaking of being supported, one way you can help change the culture of interruptions is to be an advocate for others when they are cut off, especially if you hold some level of seniority. If you notice a colleague interrupting someone, you can simply say something like, “I think Rebecca wasn’t done with her thought. Let’s let her finish before moving on.” Finally, it might help you to know that some interruptions might actually be supportive. A few years ago, Georgetown University linguistics professor Deborah Tannen coined the term “cooperative overlapping.”  She defines cooperative overlappers as “high-engagement” listeners who have a tendency to inject agreement or to “talk along” while listening.I relate deeply to this, as I have a tendency to get excited by my colleagues’ good ideas and want to chime in with my support to help bolster the thought along. I’m conscious of trying not to talk over people and would never try to take credit for an idea that wasn’t mine. I know it’s usually best to wait for someone to finish speaking before adding support. Still, if you’re being interrupted, it might be useful to take a pause to see if it’s actually someone who’s in your corner.Want more on interruptions at work? Here you go: 5 tactics to use when you’re interrupted or talked over Interruptions happen. But the people cutting in the most during meetings will surprise you 4 ways to respond when ‘manterrupted’ at work Why your understanding of interruptions may be all wrong

How should I handle being constantly interrupted?

Welcome to Pressing QuestionsFast Company’s work-life advice column. Every week, deputy editor Kathleen Davis, host of The New Way We Work podcast, will answer the biggest and most pressing workplace questions.

Q:  How should I handle being constantly interrupted?

A:
Hold on, I’m going to let you finish . . .

Being interrupted is not only annoying, it can feel demoralizing. It’s also incredibly common. Unsurprisingly, research shows that being talked over and interrupted in meetings happens much more to women, people of color, and LGBTQ+ employees. Also, the more senior the employee, the more likely they are to interrupt you. Which means there’s likely an uncomfortable power dynamic at play too.

If you find that you are being interrupted a lot in meetings, it’s likely not your fault. Those who speak loudest or most frequently aren’t always the ones with the best ideas. But the work of changing those dynamics is a much bigger issue than we can tackle here. So let’s focus on what you can change. 

You might take a page from Vice President Kamala Harris’s firm tone and direct messaging in her 2020 debate with Mike Pence: “If you don’t mind letting me finish, I’m speaking.” If it worked in shutting down Pence, it will hopefully get the message through to the spotlight-stealer in your office. 

If that feels too confrontational, you can simply start back where you started after the interruption is finished by saying something like: “Thank you, Mike. To complete my point, I’d like to say . . . ” or  “One point I wanted to make is . . . ”

This works whether you are interrupted to be contradicted or supported.

But speaking of being supported, one way you can help change the culture of interruptions is to be an advocate for others when they are cut off, especially if you hold some level of seniority. If you notice a colleague interrupting someone, you can simply say something like, “I think Rebecca wasn’t done with her thought. Let’s let her finish before moving on.”

Finally, it might help you to know that some interruptions might actually be supportive. A few years ago, Georgetown University linguistics professor Deborah Tannen coined the term “cooperative overlapping.”  She defines cooperative overlappers as “high-engagement” listeners who have a tendency to inject agreement or to “talk along” while listening.

I relate deeply to this, as I have a tendency to get excited by my colleagues’ good ideas and want to chime in with my support to help bolster the thought along. I’m conscious of trying not to talk over people and would never try to take credit for an idea that wasn’t mine. I know it’s usually best to wait for someone to finish speaking before adding support. Still, if you’re being interrupted, it might be useful to take a pause to see if it’s actually someone who’s in your corner.

Want more on interruptions at work? Here you go: